Fantasy Football Week 13: Ice, Ice Baby

By M3Swagger

Because the real NHL season is nothing more than fantasy at this time, hockey phraseology as it relates to that sport is on hold. But, entering the final week of the regular fantasy football season, here are a few hockey terms that apply to fantasy football as one looks toward either growing a playoff beard or taking an unwanted break until next year.

A line change is not a bad thing. If you haven’t made a single transaction all year, you are either the greatest drafter ever, the most loyal fantasy owner of all time, or so out of it that you bagged this season long ago. It is now or never to make changes. Ship out the unproductive and injured and make room for the likes of Ryan Broyles, Brandon Stokley, Shane Vereen and, once again, Rashad Jennings. Do so even if it means cutting the likes of Rob Gronkowski, whose injury may outlast your team’s playoff run. What good would zero points do other than take up a roster spot.

Icing is a fantasy football tactic in which you may acquire players you don’t need simply to “ice-out” your competitors. You may never start Chad Henne or Joe Flacco, but with quarterbacks falling like pre-National Anthem extras in the movie “Slap Shot,” having them on the roster is important so that other teams cannot. The same goes for running backs. The Giants’ David Wilson is suddenly the new Andre Brown.  Do you trust Ahmad Bradshaw to stay healthy? If Bradshaw is on your opponent’s roster, then take away his backup.  If you’re on the playoff bubble, you likely have a lower waiver preference, so you can pull off this sort of thing.

Shoot the puck to spruce up your team – i.e. take a chance. For example, if you have this luxury, it would be a good idea to sit Marshawn Lynch who faces the Bears, but start Bryce Brown against the Cowboys.  Forgive the skeptic who hesitated on acquiring and starting the Eagles’ Brown, given a recent forgettable history with the Raiders’ Taiwan Jones who stepped in it when Darren McFadden went down with injury, Brown seemed like a stretch. But, despite a pair of fumbles, he registered a great night and is suddenly the Eagles’ lone weapon.

The man advantage moves from the Browns, who faced the anemic Steelers last week, to the Ravens this week. The Ben-less Steelers are shorthanded and have named Jonathan Dwyer as the new starting running back. The offense is going nowhere fast – maybe faster. Meanwhile, the Browns get another favorable matchup at the Raiders and are worth considering as a start.

A hat trick is in the offing for Andre Johnson when the Texans face the Titans. He has had two straight huge games and is looking for that third. You’d better get another toque, eh, because Calvin Johnson has already registered three big time games in a row.

Too bad Matty “Ice” already played this week, he would be a perfect reference in this theme.  So how about Colin Kapernic? Not only is he is the new Niners’ starting QB, and not only does he match up well with the Rams, but he really has the most hockey-player-sounding name in the NFL.


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