For Those Who Love The Vikings But Hate Brett Favre – Part II

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I’ve had quite a positive response to my first round of Handbook that I posted last week. Make sure to check that out before reading this post so that you can get caught up and read steps one through five.

So one preseason game is in the books, and strangely a 1 of 4 performance for only 4 yards did not win you over to the point of strapping on a purple cheesehead with the number “4” stenciled on the sides. I can relate.

So, if the site of the grizzly, gray-haired pill-popper in purple was just too much to bear on Friday, keep reading Handbook. The hope is to try and get you past your hatred of Brett Favre, so that he doesn’t succeed in ruining your enjoyment of yet another Vikings football season.

Step Six: It’s In The Game, But He’s Not

Madden 2010 came out just a gray hair too early, and the fine folks at EA Sports were unable to add Favre into the game. Instead, if you want the mountain man on your team then you have to download a roster update.

As someone who hates Brett Favre, this presents you with some options.

First, you could forego the download altogether and just play the season with whichever quarterback you thought was going to win the starting nod. Afterall, video games are a fantasy world in which you get a say… so why not prefer to live in a world where Brett Favre simply re-un-un-re-re-un-retired (i.e. stayed home).

Second, you can do the download and then immediately cut him or trade him. If you do this, I recommend trading him to the Lions for a half-eaten pack of skittles. This will ensure that you get to pound Favre into the ground at least twice a season. Taking control of Jared Allen or E.J. Henderson will have never been so fun.

Third, you can always just play it out. I know, you’ll feel a little bit dirty about it. But if you’re a purest, and always play that first season with the as-is roster, then it’s not your fault. Play it out and if you can’t stand it just bench him in favor of Tarvaris Jackson. Then you’ll smile to yourself knowing that if it were the real Brett Favre you’d just benched then he’d probably retire just in time to unretired and join the Lions in order to get “payback.” At that point, the scenario described in the second section would become a reality.

Step Seven: Do Not Accept “I Told You So”

You’ve doubtless got some friends who think getting Favre was the best football move in the history of sports. They’re Super Bowl bound now! Is it too Early to talk about an undefeated season!?! Imagine how much better Adrian Peterson will be! Please, give me a break.

Well, I’m warning you, this talk will get worse before it gets better. Look at the first three games. Browns, Lions, and Niners to start off the season. They could bring back Terry Bradshaw and he would lead this Vikings team to a 3-0 start against this schedule. Favre probably will, too.

So come week four, that incredibly hyped game against the Pack, there will be a lot of Favre ass-kissing going on by certain Vikings fans. They’ll want to shove it in your face how wrong you were when you said getting Favre was a terrible idea. Don’t let them get the best of you, though. Don’t respond at all.

Afterall, you are smart enough to realize that the Vikings have a schedule coming up that includes actual football teams like the Ravens, Steelers, Bears and Giants.

So, while many people will have counted their chickens before they’ve hatched in week four, remember that 75% of the schedule still remains. And that those teams are much, much tougher.

Step Eight: Realize It’ll All Be Over Soon

The guy isn’t some sort of vampire (that we know of) so it isn’t like he’ll be a Viking forever. So while you know this is going to be painful, just think of it as a quick shot in the ass. Like the doctor says, “you’re going to feel a slight pinch, might sting a little, but then it’ll all be over.”

So, make sure to look to the future. No matter how well or poor the Vikings are playing, it never hurts to keep an eye on next year’s quarterback crop. So don’t be afraid to keep yourself informed on Phillip Rivers’ contract status (this is his last year) or how the top college quarterbacks are doing.

Jevon Snead, Sam Bradford, Colt McCoy, and Tim Tebow will be able to give you some hope for next season. So don’t be afraid to treat Favre as exactly what he is… a one year stop gap.

So while having Favre under center this year might sting a little, it’ll all be over soon.

Step Nine: Become Bernard Berrian’s Biggest Fan

On Friday, we all saw how “experts” are willing to throw our receiver under the bus. They were absolutely ridiculous with their “the receivers should’ve been where Favre threw it” reaction to Favre’s poor outing. Of course, Favre couldn’t have just thrown crappy passes… impossible.

So , in order to get through this season as a Vikings fan that hates Brett Favre, you will need to become the biggest fan of the Vikings wide outs. You need to cheer for the talent we have there.

So when Bernard Berrian blazes for a 74 touchdown or Sidney Rice snags a one-handed first down make sure to not hold yourself back from cheering just because Favre threw the pass.

Give credit to the pass catchers and make sure to keep it positive by rooting for the passing team. Don’t be afraid to give credit to Favre when it is necessary, as well. We’ve never doubted that the guy is capable of making plays, and acknowledging a well-thrown pass is not going to make you a traitor like he is.

However, the Vikings receivers are going to get blamed for every poor Favre throw, so don’t be afraid to give them a little extra credit in your household when the make the veteran look good.


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7 Responses to “For Those Who Love The Vikings But Hate Brett Favre – Part II”

  1. Sus says:

    how refreshing another hater article – why not show some skills (like brett farve has) and write an article that shows facts instead of obvious hater opinions… tiring…. asif you would ever have the option to retire and then be good enough to even have a chance to come back…

  2. Kyle Berglund says:

    I’m sorry, but how funny was the banner tow at Lambeau on Saturday. I found a link for everyone who missed it

    http://www.daveryanshow.com/pages/daveslatest.html?feed=336979&article=5914498

  3. Kevin says:

    Gotta love bloggers. Gotta love the internet. Where else could they have an audience where they can spew uneduated BS?

  4. Frank says:

    You just wish you have 16 years with the Greenbay Packers

  5. Patrick says:

    I’m thrilled that the Vikings finally got their trophy. I hate Favre as much as you hate me, a Packer fan. Favre is a bigger flip-flopper than John Kerry and I’m happy to be off of the emotional roller coaster. Enjoy the ride Vikings. I’m happy with #12 who won’t be throwing up desperation passes in the NCF championship game.

  6. Favre fan says:

    Lotsa yakk and yammer over two three posts.

    Let’s take this to another level, okay? Up or down, depends upon the reader’s leanings.

    Favre has increased revenue for the Vikings, hands down. (No doubt some Packer/Favre fans bought season tickets. Negative, and positive.)

    Not all Packers fans hate Favre. They certainly don’t want the Vikes to win over the Pack, but they don’t hate Favre.

    Every team Farve has been on, he’s thrown an interception as his last pass. It’s in the books.

    Leonard, on Aug 22nd, said Favre was the only reason the Packers had a team. I can’t dispute that; I’ve said far too many times that Packers mgmt wouldn’t give Favre anyone to play with in his latter years with the Pack.

    Benching Favre — I hope it happens this year. I hope he sits out a start, at least. Baseball’s ironman sat out a game just to get the whole sick thing out of the way. I hope Chili will do it if Favre doesn’t.

    Yeah, right. *snork* It’s Favre’s biggest liability on the team.

    Vikes Superbowl bound with Favre at the helm? How childish. They play the games for a reason. It may be great, it may not. Favre sure does raise a buzz though, don’t he?

    “Don’t respond.” I do this all the time. I am ecstatic that Farve will play again this year. Most folks are negative …. I allow them their opinion, and shrug. Doesn’t change how I feel.

    Terry Bradshaw was a Steeler. Pick a previous Viking, please. A whiner would be nice.

    I watched the NFheLL network’s replay of Favre’s first preseason passes as a Viking. Yes, the announcers were pro-Favre. Yet they allowed how the timing was off, explaining things rather well. And the completed pass, into tight double coverage, was awesome.

    Traitor? TRAITOR?? GB mgmt gave Favre no one to play with (I’ve said this too many times …) Favre did what he had to do to get out of his contract with GB, and did pretty good for the Jets before injury. The aftertalk was that he was too non-communicative in the Jets’ locker room. He’d said that he was the old man in the locker room with GB. As an older soul myself, methinks I can understand.

    Favre leaves it all on the field, and his play for the Jets was good until injury, especially considering the complete change of system. I wish the Jets would’ve had the b-alls to bench him. Nobody wants to be known as the team who benched a HOF’er. Again, I hope Favre benches himself this year … not bloody likely, but I can hope.

    Giving credit to ‘pass catchers’ … how perfectly technical a description … I agree. Favre may not be breaking receivers’ fingers anymore, but those who catch on to his tune, and allow him to catch on to theirs, deserve all kudos.

    Favre yakks and points and gestures and talks to receivers after a missed reception. If he stops doing this, throw in the towel, the season is over.

    Favre is passionate about the game of football. He will do everything he can to win. GB made his job difficult, allowing his uniform to clean the field regularly. If the Viking O line can hold better than it did in Favre’s first preseason game, fantastic things can happen.

    The Vikings have an awesome team. If things come together, 2009-2010 will be a fabulous year.

    They have to play the games. No computer can factor in the humanity. This isn’t chess, so cut and dried.

    As a Packer/Farve fan, I have detested the Vikings since I saw … a Viking push a thumb into a Packer’s eye, not seen by officials, but caught by the camera. No penalty, in the years between replay challenges.

    I bought a Viking tree ornament at the second-hand store this summer. I almost donated it back when Favre talked of knees and ankles, but decided to wait.

    I doubt anyone was more ecstatic upon hearing Favre signed with the Vikings. My high lasted for days. This gives Favre the opportunity to show that with a real team, he can be one heck of a QB, not the sad spectacle he was during the last few yrs at GB.

    They have to play the games. IF Favre can accept his age, and IF the he and the team can get on the same page, this may be the most awesome team in NFheLL history.

    NFheLL is the system that tries to get every penny out of the fans, yet denies them the ability to see games outside their geographical boundaries (outside pricey DTv.) Stupid beyond belief. The NFheLL is cutting off their noses to spite their faces.

    I hated the Vikes. I am now rooting for the Vikes, because I appreciate Favre. Maybe it doesn’t make sense to anyone but me, but I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam.

    I’m also rooting for GB. Just not in the Vikes games. Three nineteen.

    I dislike the cowboys even more than I ever disliked the Vikes, yet even the ‘boys had the sense to trade TO. Tides change.

    I’ve been a GB / Favre fan since before all the records, since before the SB win and the subsequent SB loss. I’m still a GB fan, and always will be. Yet I’ll suspend it for a year or two, and root for Favre the man. I’ll hang the Vike ornament this Dec.

    In the meantime, I will watch the games be played, and hope I will enjoy.

    Pretty much like any other fan, eh?

  7. Maggie says:

    Stop and think of this a minute. Bret Favre was on top of the world with the Greenbay Packers. He made good money had a good Contract. Has a Beautiful wife and two Beautiful daughters. Has a beautiful home in Mississippi. Is sitting on top of the world.Has something like 16 years with the Greenbay Packers then this cry baby attitude kicks in not that it hasn’t been there all the time. If it hadn’t been for his wife Deana keeping the family together even with her cancer going on he would not have been strong enough to survive it all.He ruins his career with the Packers and his Contract because of his Big Baby attitude and quits because he can’t get along with a coach because he is on his high horse. Can’t make up his mind if he wants to retire or come back. Well they can’t wait forever for his babh attitude to make up his mind so they move on. He moves on to the Jets and does the same thing to them again Baby Cakes attitude. Now he is at Minnesota and does the same Baby Attitude with Minnesota and can’t make up his mind every year do I quit or do I come back. Now he send obscene picture to some other chick trying to prove his manly hood while married still to Deanna who has stood by him through all of this BS crap. All the time embarrassing his wife and his two daughters and himself. Ruining his career, downgrading his family,every single one of them. He could have retired when he was flying high with the Greenbay Packers when people were proud of him, but no he chooses to go out DEGRADING HIMSELF AND HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN. What kind of a man would do this to anyone.
    ME I NEVER LIKED BRETT FAVRE WHEN HE FIRST CAME TO THE GREENBAY PACKERS I ALWAYS THOUGHT THERE WAS SOMETHING RADICALLY WRONG WITH THE MAN AND STILL DO. To me Deanna should divorce him and take every darn thing he has and leave him totally busted for all the junk he has done to her and her children. SO THERE I SAID IT AND I AM HAPPY NOW. LOL